Here is picture of our daughter from our first ultrasound. Now you can put a face (skeleton face for right now) to what's going on. I've been too sad to look at the pictures but I was looking at them today and she is totally beautiful and has the exact same nose as Roman and Finn.
Today we got a small update from our genetic counselor. I'm horrible at relaying this information on but I will try to sum it up. The rapid screening test shows the they don't think it's anything bigger causing the spina bifida. It's not as accurate as the chromosonal culture but those results take 8-10 days. Also, one of the numbers they were looking at shows that the spinal cord may not be open which means no spinal surgery after birth. Which all the surgery does is close the hole not repair any defect. I should be happy but my first blood test showed I had only a 1 in 400 chance of the baby having a neural tube defect. Also, my first ultrasound diagnosis was wrong. I am such a "prepare for the worst" type person. I will just have to wait and see when she is born.
I am listening to Coldplays "Fix You" on repeat lately. It's kinda my anthem to our daughter.
When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I
Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones And I will try to fix you
We have another ultrasound (#4) scheduled for next Tuesday at Childrens Hospital and a consult with the pediatric neurosurgeon afterwards.
1 comment:
I am such a "prepare for the worst" person too. But don't let it drown all of your hope! Some hopeful signs it sounds like.
That song is so beautiful. I've been in love with it ever since I saw the routine they choreographed for it on so you think you can dance. When you posted it on fb the other day, I could see your connection.
Thinking of you guys still!
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